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The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment, by Jack Morin
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Challenging accepted theories about what makes for terrific sex, The Erotic Mind is a breakthrough exploration of the least understood dimensions of human sexuality—the psychology of desire, arousal, and fulfillment. Nationally known sex therapist Dr. Jack Morin offers a bold new perspective that celebrates the joys of Eros without denying its risks.
Based on an in-depth analysis of over 1,000 provocative stories of peak sexual experiences, The Erotic Mind offers clear, accessible guidance on how anyone can utilize his or her own peak encounters and fantasies as powerful tools of self-discovery.
The Erotic Mind explains the many paradoxes of erotic life, such as: why we're most excited when we must overcome obstacles; how anxiety, guilt, and anger—generally thought to have a negative impact on sexual arousal—often turn out to be aphrodisiacs; how we use unresolved issues from our early lives to intensify passion; and why the best sex is dynamic and unpredictable, rather than static and safe.
These and other insights, combined with concrete suggestions for increasing our enjoyment, overcoming our problems, and revitalizing our relationships, will change forever the way we think about our eroticism.
- Sales Rank: #71818 in eBooks
- Published on: 2012-11-13
- Released on: 2012-11-13
- Format: Kindle eBook
From Publishers Weekly
Too many sex therapists focus only on the removal of inhibitions, thus ignoring the complex and paradoxical sources of passion, declares San Francisco-area psychotherapist Morin in this intriguing, insightful mix of analysis, anecdote and advice. Drawing on 351 respondents, straight and gay, who discussed their erotic lives with him, Morin has developed an "erotic equation": attraction plus obstacles leads to excitement. This formula, he avers, is neither tidy nor predictable. He suggests that sexual obstacles in one's youth create lifelong scripts for arousal, while a range of feelings?including exuberance, anxiety and anger?can intensify arousal. Morin advises readers to confront the unresolved feelings that produce "troublesome turn-ons" and offers a seven-step guide to modifying or expanding one's erotic patterns. In long-term relationships, Morin observes, passion is hardly guaranteed; he advises couples to recognize and address the interactive tension between intimacy and sexual desire. $35,000 marketing campaign; author tour.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Unlike most authors who focus simply on physiological fulfillment, sex therapist and psychotherapist Morin asserts that it is our erotic psyches that require detailed examination. More specifically, he claims that understanding our peak sexual experiences and fantasies offers the greatest opportunity for self-discovery and, thus, revitalized sexual experiences. Based on a groundbreaking, in-depth study of more than 1000 provocative confessional stories, Morin's theories are supported here by excerpts and analysis. His new perspective offers insight into the many paradoxes of erotic life, such as how anxiety, guilt, and anger?generally thought to have a negative impact on sexual arousal?often turn out to be aphrodisiacs and why the best sex is dynamic and risky rather than static and safe. While this work is written in a jargon-free language for a broad appeal, its more detailed sexual passages may be a concern in certain environments. Nevertheless, Morin's thought-provoking book is essential for all human sexuality collections.?David R. Johnson, Arnold LeDoux Lib., Louisiana State Univ., Eunice
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
Review
"A lucid and compelling exploration of long-neglected aspects of Eros."
-- --Lonnie Barbach, Ph.D., author of For Yourself, For Each Other, and Erotic Interludes
"The Erotic Mind offers unexpected opportunities for intimate partners to translate their appreciation into passionate and fulfilling sex." -- --John Gray,Ph.D., author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus
Most helpful customer reviews
180 of 186 people found the following review helpful.
Positive Review by a Psychologist
By David H. Peterzell PhD PhD
In order to be licensed to practice clinical psychology in California, it is necessary to take a seminar on human sexuality. That's how I first heard about this book. The organizer believed that this is the foremost text on human sexuality and sex therapy, and now I can see why...
This is powerful, valuable stuff. Here's what makes it good:
1. I believe that Morin's landmark contribution is his "paradoxical perspective on eroticism." It challenges a variety of widely-accepted theories about attraction and great sex. As Morin states, "this new paradigm acknowledges and embraces the contradictory, dual-edged nature of erotic life. It recognizes that anything that inhibits arousal-including anxiety or guilt-can, under different circumstances, amplify it." The paradoxical view is at the heart of what makes this book special. It isn't just some scholarly, cerebral view, but rather a theory with profound experiential/practical significance. For instance, as one more fully experiences the profoundest subjective erotic rewards, one also experiences more strongly the tension between passion and fulfillment.
2. The book unearths readers' own sexual desires and sexual behaviors (or "Core Erotic Themes"), using unique self-assessment tools. Lots of people (including me) feel that this book really helps them see for the first time their sexual essence, which underlies their perplexing historical feelings and behaviors. Somehow, the revelations are more relieving than shocking. As you get to the bottom of what really turns you on within Morin's system, the world may look different! Of course, there's also great value in determining what makes your partner (or potential partner) click.
3. The book provides concrete tools for understanding and achieving peak eroticism ("emotional aphrodisiacs"). These include ways to increase sexual and orgasmic intensity, reduce inhibitions, improve validation received and given, and transcend personal boundaries. Additionally, it provides ways to address "troublesome turn-ons" which lead to destructive, repetitive behaviors.
4.Morin clarifies how to intensify desire and arousal in oneself and others. Much of the work is paradoxical, and explores eroticism in ways not available elsewhere. Moreover, it provides ways to evaluate sexual well-being from the "paradoxical" perspective ("signposts to erotic health")
5. It provides plenty revealing stories of peak sexual experiences. These stories improve understanding, but more importantly detoxify stigma, anxiety, guilt, anger and avoidance. Most people will find their doppelgangers here...
6. The author is a well established sex therapist, researcher, and psychotherapist.
If I have any criticism, it is that the book becomes repetetive in places. So what?
78 of 80 people found the following review helpful.
A must read for anyone across the board
By A Customer
I bought this book because of some issues that I wanted to understand and resolve in my relationship (mostly waning desire.) This is the first book that I've read that doesn't just give some corny advice on behavior change (spend more time together, touch eachother more, etc.) This book really gets at the heart of where our desires come from, how we are influenced by our early erotic thoughts and how this knowledge can help us overcome troublesome issues. The other wonderful thing this book did for me was explain how waning desire is normal and may not signal the end of your relationship. The self assessment tool was also very helpful, as was the non-judgmental analysis of the erotic fantasies of those who were surveyed for the book. It is not smutty and not too clinical in it's approach, just very practical. This is the first book that I feel my spouse will actually read and derive some benefit from. I am recommending it to everyone I know that wants to get in better touch with their sexuality or just improve their relationships in general.
54 of 57 people found the following review helpful.
This book has changed my life.
By Mel F. Louis
I don't know how to contact Jack Morin, so I will use this review to say "Thank You" for writing this book.
This book has helped me "unlock", reveal to myself and finally...to understand *why* I have behaved the way I have sexually, and why I have made so many of the other "non-sexual" choices I have made in my life (and I have been searching for these answers for most of my adult life).
His thoughtful approach to non self-judgemental exploration, and his practical and conscientous suggestions for overcoming (or accepting) the most vexing facets of your sexual being make for a book that to my knowledge, has no equal.
I can't believe there is anyone who wouldn't be transformed by careful reading of this book, and its value only increases when you are able to pass it on to someone you care about.
If your heart weighs heavy with the choices you have made, and you "question" why you desire the things, people and situations that you do...you must read this book.
This is one of 5 or 6 books I will never be without.
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